Posts tagged ‘Godwin’

May 10, 2010

A merger of equals!

5 days ago, upon hearing of the Continental/United airlines merger, I decided to send Continental a message to express my dismay:

Dear Continental Airlines,

You have always been my favorite airline to fly because of the comfort and services you offer, which exceed the ones of other airlines.
I hope this merger with United will not dilute what makes you truly special.
I have two questions for you:

  1. will your seats recline less now? I had a very comfortable flight from Houston to Tokyo on your plane and a very sucky one from Tokyo to Bangkok on United. I enjoyed the space of a queen on Continental and was packed like a rat on United.
  2. what will happen to the snackies? Continental has shown more generosity and consideration in feeding passengers than United ever has. Please tell me this won’t be the end of the snackies. Please. Snackies…


This evening, I glanced at my inbox and noticed they wrote me back! I was excited and giddily opened the e-mail:

Dear Madam:

Thank you for contacting the OnePass Service Center.

This is a merger of equals, bringing together the best of both organizations and cultures to create a world-class airline with tremendous and enduring strengths.

We will keep you informed throughout the planned integration process. Please visit our dedicated joint merger website for the latest news and updates:


OnePass Service Center

What kind of half-assed answer is that? The customer service representative not only superbly ignored both my (very pertinent, mind you) questions, and also told me to go look for information elsewhere (which is the customer service equivalent of telling someone to go fly a kite). I am proud to say the organization I work for treats its customers much better than that and that place is the D to the M to the V.

I wonder if they’ll respond to my follow-up e-mail:

“I bet Austria thought it was entering a merger of equals back in 1938…”